| (no subject) |
[Jul. 24th, 2004|11:41 am] |
Well, sleep was nice.
As soon as I finish this Sun Drop, I'm off to camp for a couple hours.
I've decided not to take my computer, I don't want to pack/unpack it.
Let alone take the LCD monitor, that's just asking for trouble.
Perhaps I should talk to Peanut about me having been underpaid today, sounds good to me. I really need that extra money before I leave you know... Bad part is, we leave Wednesday, I get paid Thursday. UGH.
I could donate plasma! That's an easy 50 dollars.
I'm just talking funny 'cause I'm still tired.
Now to find a shirt, socks, and the keys. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 23rd, 2004|11:35 pm] |
Alright, now I should have time to type the stuff from camp, and other things I'd like to get out onto this blog.. woo.
I'm going back sometime tomorrow, and taking my computer back to finish fixing the camp computers.
I had fun tonight, except that I was tired half the time - and my mind was off thinking about other things. I really hate hanging out with friends when I'm off somewhere else in my head, it just doesn't feel right.
Daniel and I went and saw the new Bourne movie, which was good - maybe if I'd seen the first one it would have made more sense to me. Oh well, interesting camera angles. The director seems to be a very creative person.
Afterwards, we went to Taco Cabana, and met up with Amanda, and ate. I talked to Aaron a little bit outside, I saw that he was standing outside the window. Kind of cool talking to people I graduated with, seeing what's up. I wonder how things will be a year from now... probably not the same "Hey!".
I'm on a record of making mistakes by the way, I've vowed to stop today. These aren't health mistakes, or like running into trees. This is more of a personal, bad decision making type mistakes. I'd like to go into it, but it doesn't seem right for me to do so.
You feeling all the optimism I've got typed so far? Maybe it's because I'm tired, and not really talking to somebody, but more of to myself. Not that many people read this anyway.
I leave for Dallas in less than a week, and I'm kind of ready for it. Only thing I'm going to hate is if I don't get to drive my car. I've waited for almost 3 months now due to procrastination from my brother. I'm 18 now, maybe if I get the money I can rent a car? Or do you have to be 21 for that? *shrugs*
I was passing out on Daniel's bed watching him play Counter-Strike. It was great watching his TV instead of looking over his shoulder. Makes me want to hook up my TV again, but I'm just going to wait until I get another new LCD monitor - should be like August 4-5th... I don't quite remember.
**I wish my phone worked right now, if you've texted me - I didn't get it, and probably won't**
I've been a sucker lately for slow songs, more of emotional songs. Yes, I do realize you already know I listen to emo a lot - but I mean, the deep down stuff. I've just been so thoughtful lately.
My mom wants me to take a job with the Deparment of Defense, and hold off on going to school for a while. I'm not sure if this is such a good idea, I'd really like to get a good education while I can remember half of the stuff from High School.
Hm, I don't think I'm going to write anymore poetry.
Not for a while, at least for the public to view, but I doubt I will write anymore period.
I think my poetry gets me in a lot of trouble with myself and others. It shows raw feelings, sometimes in plain site - and other times, jumbled up to a point nobody could really figure it out. Problem is, others don't always know how to react to it, and I guess they become scared. I hate that. I also start living by what I've written sometimes, hard for me to explain what I mean about that though. It just doesn't seem like it's valued by anybody, so is it really worth it?
I'm going to find something to do, then grab some sleep. Busy Saturday ahead of me. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 23rd, 2004|05:54 pm] |
Oh wow was this short session of camp (short for me at least) quite interesting. I'm sure I'll type about it later, but right now my typing aim is off... everytime I try to nail the ' key, I hit the enter key - so I have to use backspace, which is so far away, and entirely too much effort at the moment.
I still smell like camp, plus I just helped Zach change his oil.
So I smell like oil, and wildness.
I'm pollution.
I don't know if anybody will get that joke.
I kind of missed being home, but one of the CITs, Laura, sent me text messages, which was great. I was a little stressed, read one she sends - and started laughing in the Kiwa... which attracted everybody's attention.
I'm going back tomorrow for a couple hours, but I get to take my computer with me. Yay me.
Actually, one of the director's, "Peanut", computer got a virus... I started to clean it, but realized quickly I wouldn't be able to
K, my mom and Daniel both suck. They felt it'd be great to interrupt me. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 18th, 2004|11:17 pm] |
I honestly can't believe this. I got to thinking last night, and I'm a fool.
I'm in love, and it's screaming in my face. It's been doing it all day, and I don't know what to do to quite make it right. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 17th, 2004|08:05 pm] |
Well, I'm finally home. I've been home for a while, so I guess I'm not FINALLY home, but more of, home now. "Home, I'm here." How about that...? Let me try this.
Home, I'm here! Last week was a blast, between working constantly on the chatter for the camp, and hanging out with the CITs... I got little sleep, and had lots of fun. I also had a Birthday. I'm glad Daniel text messaged me wishing me a good one, and especially glad for the CITs being the awesome people they are, and giving me a WONDERFUL Birthday.
I have a lot to type, but Daniel is supposed to be here any minute, and I should have my computer packed and ready to go.
I don't even know who Chris Hunter is, and we're having my party there... awesome! |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 11th, 2004|07:27 am] |
Poem!
like a confused child, first day of school
i don't quite understand, i only hope i will
tell me your desires, and i'll tell you mine
i could dream of laying in slumber,
i could dream of you.
where do you wish to go, tonight is ours
we'll take it at dusk, and dawn
everything will be known between us.
desperate questions, desires i can't explain
feelings, and and expressed emotions
when together, the problems go away
and baby, you're the one I remember
comfort, desires.
Last night was a long night, but it was nevertheless, awesome. Saw Fallout Boy, met the singer... they announced they'd be back with, yes, you fucking didn't guess it, Taking Back Sunday - in October.
I'm finally going to see the last band on my list, when they come - I'll have seen all my favorite bands live.
Meanwhile, I'm super tired - I didn't get home until, late, I don't know when. I need to pack, so got up super early - I have to leave Norman by around 10:30-11am if I want to make it back by 12:30. Best part, my birthday is Thursday - and um - I'm getting paid on my Birthday.
But I have to work on my Birthday, and not spend much time @ home with my friends... hm? If I don't get a night break w/ someone that night, I may very well be a tad upset... and we don't need that. I'm so f'ing tired, I'm going to pack, and see if I have time to nap. :) |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 5th, 2004|10:02 pm] |
desperate to fly away
but i wont lift
afraid of what i might do, i linger
the sun stays so high
every ounce of enthusiasm
as i pull it together, my wings extract
and i begin
my journey through the skies.
you beside me, it's always the view
that'll kill me, that'll cure me
you beside me, showing me.
i've flown so long and hard,
and never tiring, i continue on.
because you're here with me, guiding. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 4th, 2004|03:40 pm] |
write it into the sky
through these clouds, so the sun may pass
let the shine come through
oh dear, make everything possible
my heart tells me we could.
body prints in the sand
looking above, the crashing waves
everything around, everything's so profound.
sand between my toes, water washing away
it's so hard letting you go,
when moments like this exist
my dreams are vivid, such an imagination
make everything possible,
let it out to discover.
let your heart roam.
dear, it's okay
I'm behind you. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jul. 3rd, 2004|11:30 pm] |
I just had the most stressful day ever.
To top it off, I'm confused about something. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 27th, 2004|03:34 am] |
I think some people I know, are really bipolar.
First they want me to do something, then they're just, "Eh..", or seem like it.
I'm happy to be going back to camp, but something seems quite off. Either the timing of everything, or maybe I'm expecting something... haven't figured it out.
I'm probably just really tired, too. As soon as my clothes finish drying, I'm going to pack, and sleep... I'll worry about my sleeping bag in the morning, I know better than to leave without that.
New poem though, wrote it earlier today before heading off to work.
Dripping wet, this rain
Covering us
Falling, it's a downpour
I don't see an end to it
And yet you yell, "Lets go!"
But you wouldn't understand,
The thunder cracks, there's no peace
Why run from the storm
All we need to do is wait it out
Dear, we can do this together...
We've been here before, and survived.
I fear nothing more, my love.
The calm after the storm is all the reward.
Being with you, after, is my reward.
Love.
I think I need to write about a new subject, lately my poetry has been centered on something, not to say what, but it feels overused. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 26th, 2004|02:23 pm] |
I guess Lindsey talked me into it... that and the camp director.
I'm leaving tomorrow morning, early - need to be back at camp by 10am, so I can meet up, and learn what I missed in a short amount of time. I'm going to be moved into a cabin, then moved into another cabin later... crazy.
Probably after I get home from work, I'll start packing... I have it mindset of what I need, and what to absolutely not forget.
I've got quite a bit of web projects I should be working on, but they're going to be held off... again. I'm going to give Negative Image a homepage tonight, it'll take about 3-4 hours, and I have no problem living/driving on about 3 hours of sleep, I did it most of my spring semester of my Senior year.
Oh yeah, went to a LAN last night, eventually found myself passed out on Daniel's couch, I don't even really remember leaving Chris' house, but okay! ^_^ The LAN was probably the most hilarious one I've gone to, Daniel and I were trying to hunt in Lineage 2 together, seriously... yeah, um... that's like us doing anything together. If he started hitting a monster, I'd go and hit Daniel, and run away... likewise if I'm working on a monster. Eventually, he killed me - and went red... a target for anybody to kill. I killed a Korean though, it was fun. :)
I think Lineage is the only thing I'm going to miss about Norman. That, and my car. I was going to work on it today, but too tired - maybe after work. If I finish it tonight, I'll be driving it tomorrow to camp maybe, but if I take it - it'd be bumperless.
"Let me get this straight Cody... last time you camp to camp with a wrecked S10."
"Yes ma'am."
"Now you have a white car, with a black hood, and no front bumper? Let alone, it's growling at me?"
"Something like that, I'm from a very creative family you know..." |
|
|
| old, but i like |
[Jun. 20th, 2004|04:21 am] |
| How to make a livingrek |
Ingredients:
3 parts jealousy
3 parts crazyiness
3 parts energy |
Method:
Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Serve with a slice of fitness and a pinch of salt. Yum! |
|
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 19th, 2004|11:09 pm] |
I know what I want to do with my life.
Besides that, lately has been busy. I stayed at Daniel's house, helped him install his underglow kit today for his car. Before that was usual hanging out with people, constantly... haven't really been home. I still miss camp, but my car has yet to have been finished.
I might've confessed my feelings a little too much to someone, I'm not sure how she feels about it... I'd hate to ask, because of when I did it. I don't even know if she saw it.
Before Lindsey left for camp, I went to her house to see Big Fish, which by the way is a VERY cool movie, played some checkers and chess... got beat horribly in checkers, but I prevailed in chess. Going to Lindsey's house is usually a fun trip, always seem to be SOMETHING to do. I really feel sorry for her Mom though, can't even imagine the pain she's going through.
There's only one thing I'd like to be doing right now, and unfortunately I can't go off and do it. Hah, I'm excluded to my home, trapped. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 11th, 2004|07:16 am] |
well, i woke up sick, saw it coming though.
After taking a shower, I talked to my parents... when they finally did ask me to quit. I'm going to call Zach later about the job at Ozzies washing dishes. Kind of blows, I woke up optimistic about camp, and had all my stuff ready to go.
Grr fucking dammit, nothing is going right lately. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 10th, 2004|11:39 pm] |
|
back from camp for a night. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 6th, 2004|11:47 am] |
I got the job, I leave tomorrow.
I already found my sleeping bag, and make a run to the store - I'll start packing in a little bit.
Anyway, since I got back from the Camp, all I've done is sleep. Sleep, wake up, cough a little, sleep. I don't FEEL sick, but dammit... this isn't normal. I've slept almost, 20 hours in the past 26. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 5th, 2004|06:46 am] |
Okay, let me get this straight... it's like, 7am, and I'm awake? Aww, this is new.
I was simply playing games in Noble last night, after buying a new motherboard - when I got the message to call the camp director of Cimmarron (a camp Lindsey generally volunteers at during summers, but suggested I join her), so I did - and she asked what time I wanted an interview. One, they've REALLY got to be desperate if she just asked me for an interview, I mean seriously... look who we're talking about, Cody.
Anyhow, she asked what time would be best for me, and being the SLICK person I am - I left it up to her, for a convient time - it's HER convience that matters, otherwise I would've simply said 6pm.
No, she wanted to see me at 10am. Let me get this straight, a hour away, and 10am. That means, leave no later than 9, wake up by 7:30 to 8. Bad enough driving a hour in a truck I *hate*. It's not bad to drive around locally, but it's uncomfortable, and slow.
Worst of it all, it's WRECKED. Sure, it was a great deal - 2000$ for a '99 S10. But still, WHAT IS THE POINT OF BUYING A WRECKED TRUCK IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO FIX IT? MMKAY?
My car won't be finished until... gasp... Monday. That's if EVERYTHING goes right. He wanted to tell me later next week if anything goes wrong, (him = brother). By the way, my brother is... oh how do you say... pissing me off, lately.
It kind of started in March when he was full of BS to take this project on himself... you know, so I could run into lots of *little* problems, and not have my car for over 2-3 months. I had an alternative you know, would take 3 days, and cost just about the same... only would require an initial drive to Tulsa to pick the car back up when it was done. Oh well. At least now I know where everything is, and I don't have to let anybody fix it when I could do it myself.
Anyhow, he really started pissing me off when Zach and I went to his house to get my motor mounts - which he cleverly came up with about 4 stories, in 30 minutes, of why one of them were missing. Zach gave me a funny face, I agreed. I asked if it was still on the motor, brother said no... I started calling junk yards.
I talk to a guy who was cool enough to explain a lot about my motor, and especially the motor mounts... how this one my brother "lost, broke, threw away" (pick a story), was a LIQUID mount, unlike the others... so would look COMPLETELY different.
Cody hangs up, makes a quick call to brother, brother says, "Oh...", and suddenly that mount he threw away never left the engine. W-t-f mate?
Oh, did I mention yet? For quite some time, and if you've lan'd with me - you know - I've had a problem with freezing, or lately, not even start up. I always dismissed this as my powersupply failing, but it was never the case. My motherboard was failing, it had a swollen, overheating capacitor. So, the guys in Noble had this motherboard priced at 100$, and told me they'd sell it at price. Ended up saving around 40$, so I went ahead and installed it there... and got everything restored in about 30 minutes of downloading. They were talking about having a lan of Cossacks, and Battlefield: Vietnam, so I stuck around to play. We played about a 2 hour game of Cossacks - which was great, never played it before. Zach always wanted me to play, and now I know how to play - so I'll have to fight Zach.
The owner of Computer Medics (in Noble), is Zach's Uncle... that's how I know them.
After about 10 minutes, I figured the swing of things, from watching Sean, Zach's uncle - who was doing GREAT. Worked well as a team even, and ended up kicking ass. Apparentally, the other team also had two guys that were pretty good... and we slaughtered them, one by one. At the end of the game, a guy there - Mike(?), was saying next game he's going to kick my ass first, because he didn't like my strategy.
I left before a second game started, had to get home and grab some sleep. I didn't go to sleep until around 4 anyway, so should've stayed. Oh well, I asked them to let me know if they have another... if I have time, I want to go.
Anyhow, I've got to find a shirt, and find out why my cat is looking at the wall was blankly. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 1st, 2004|03:10 pm] |
Lately has been weird - trying to keep entertained. I've finally graduated, now I have to start finding things to do.
I need to check the mail.
Ah, sweet. I got the DVD's that James sent me, now I am entertained - Initial: D. I'm downloading the codec to watch them, divx is fun.
I was hoping more money would come in, but I guess not - only have 125$ so far, I know more will eventually come, maybe. Anything I get goes to fixing my car, and paying my Mom back, as well as Christy (20$).
Last night was probably one of the only nights I've stayed up thinking for so long, about one thing. I'm still pretty unsure, but I'll figure it out. Josh knocked on my window, around 12am while James was explaining a lot to me - so I didn't get to reply to him, but he left a lot to think about.
This download is taking so long, does anybody with broadband need a roomate?
Sometime today I need to go work on the lawn mower, supposed to change the plugs/filter/etc on it, so that it runs beautifully again. I'm thinking of removing the muffler, and putting a cone filter on it for fun... but I'm sure my parents wouldn't see the amusing side of that... it'd be too much of a beast for them to handle. |
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
| |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
livingrek's journal